No Terraria :(

Bethesda, my hand is perfectly tuned for my dick.

That doesn’t mean it’s preferable to a moist orifice.

For the uninitiated, the game was banned, not because of the gratuitous violence, extreme drug use, and themes involving fugue states, war crimes and cold war conspiracy,

But because of a scene depicting rape.

Except, the “depiction” was simply a character, from a pixelated top-down view, climbing onto the other character. No nudity, no thrusting - then…

The director yells “CUT!”

Turns out, it was a movie being filmed. So even within the context of the game, it wasn’t rape, it was an abstraction of an abstraction, WITHIN an abstraction.

Ratings board are morons.

As an Aussie, I was lucky to have a friend gift this to me on Steam.

Pure genius though. Gets the first spot of any game list it’s featured in, when sorting alphabetically.

Bethesda, my dick has a fanbase of one.

Changing your studios name doesn’t change the fact that 343i is structurally bankrupt

In addition to this, Valve is also becoming involved in restructuring the Wayland Protocols, called Frog Protocols.

What is the significance of the Frog?

Surely these things are related somehow?

I don’t know man, sounds like something you should be asking Todd at the next shareholder meeting.

I’m expecting:

• dialogue choices to be binary.
• all NPC’s are voiced by Todd.
• there’s a mandatory 200GB texture pack update on day one.
• the Creation Club is integral to the main story.
• skills are distilled down to STRONG, BENDY, SMART.
• these three skills have a perk tree which is actually just a perk stick with no branches.
• AI assesses whether your constructed town is good enough and won’t let you proceed to the next mission unless you’ve gone to Granny Earl’s house for three consecutive IRL Sunday’s and sent photos of your freshly baked Sweet Roll™ to the Bethesda’s Antarctic game studio (you incur all costs associated with postage) in the middle of Winter (May).
• races outside of Imperial are DLC, as is any skin colour besides white, and any genital options besides “Jewish”.

Sweet Jesus…

DO ISAAC YOU PUSSIES. MAKE AN ELEVEN MINUTE ANIMATION ABOUT A RELIGIOUS WACKJOB HEARING GOD TELL HER TO KILL HER SON, WHO FLEES TO THE BASEMENT AND FIGHTS AN ABORTION WITH HIS TEARS

How old?

I didn’t mean OP was a single-parent. I meant I haven’t met any parents.

In any case, are you telling me you haven’t ever let your kid watch TV because you were too busy?

I’m going to assume you don’t have kids.

Unless you’ve had kids you don’t understand that it is practically impossible to complete even the most basic tasks unless your child is distracted.

Staying on top of household duties while managing a child is challenging enough, but then add on work, study, and every other responsibility.

I’ve never met a single parent who shares your opinion.

It feels completely natural to me, but I think it is unintuitive, and games which feature it without explaining it are disadvantaging people with less gaming literacy.

It’s similar to the mechanic in shooting games, where reloading while there is at least one bullet in the gun results in a faster reload (because the gun doesn’t need to be cocked).

It’s realistic, but I feel that it should be ignored, in the same way each bullet from the old mag magically transfers into a new mag.

TIL Netflix has a gaming option.

Not to mention Steam/Valve uses a significant portion of their resources to develop Proton.

Putting pressure on Microsoft is PRICELESS.

I used to hold the Warframe world record for fastest “100% achievements” at just over 1,600 hours (mind you, I wasn’t rushing).

I stopped playing shortly after Deimos released (late 2020). Is it worth revisiting?

Games are art. I have full respect for an artist who does not compromise their vision for someone who refuses to engage with the art, on the artists terms.

A lot of people played The Witcher 3 and thought the combat was boring, but never spent time preparing for battle by considering which oils and potions to use - because they didn’t need to. They were playing on easy or normal.

These people robbed themselves of the experience of immersing themselves in the role of a Witcher, and turned each encounter into a button masher.

Imagine being a developer and seeing people shit on your game for ‘unengaging combat’.

Now, sure, you can make the argument that that’s just one element of The Witcher 3, and some people are playing for the story - and fair enough.

But there isn’t anything analogous in the Souls franchise. The gameplay IS bashing your head against a wall for ten hours. You don’t get to just turn down the difficulty, breeze through every boss on the first try, and claim the game is boring.

Paragraphs are your friends

There are at least three four users who enjoy deep throating Tim Sweeny in this thread.