I’m pretty sure self-hosting Confluence isn’t possible anymore, or is being sunsetted as a product. I use Confluence at work and compared to Outline it’s noticeably slower in navigation and search. Agree 100% at the pain of configuring it though, it took me two attempts, months apart to get it running. The nice thing, from a self-hosting perspective, is once you’ve built it you also have object-storage, local auth and a database in your network for other self-hosted services that support those things, or for things you build yourself!
Not sure why SAML is paywalled but there’s a bunch of options for SSO at the free tier. Google, Microsoft, Slack, Gitlab, OIDC. I deployed a Keycloak instance to provide auth.